I distinctly remember a few years ago when I got the DVD of the Smashing Pumpkins Greatest Hits, and watched a gig from Seattle where they played Geek USA. They rocked out so hard it scarred my heart. I prayed to God and said I would give my left nut to see them play live – I now owe him my left nut.
At first I was skeptical about the impending reality of seeing the Pumpkins, albeit sans original lineup. It was mainly Corgan with support of Chamberlin who wrote the material anyway, so I’m not too fazzled by that part. However, it’s just the idea of liking something so much, investing your own feelings toward a certain art, and to be given the privilege of being a part of it. I mean, being a part it although you’re the audience, in some passive visceral way, still puts you in the boundaries of being able to share that collective experience together with the artist. And I can’t imagine anything else less gratifying.
I was secretly hoping that they would suck. Just to ground the whole idea of them as my personal super band. But no. Billy’s guitar had this familiar voice, which I’ve heard countless times blasting through my speakers before. But this time, it was real. So heavy, so pure, and so real. Shit, they rocked. I have no idea how the band manages to recreate the depth of their sound, outside of the studio. I am just totally smitten. I’m on Craiglist now trying to find pit tickets for tomorrow’s show. It’s the last show of their tour. My new t-shirt says “Celebrating 20 Years of Sadness”.
Thank you, Smashing Pumpkins for allowing me to know what it’s like to feel, when you realize you love music.