Yearly Archives: 2005

the weight of the world is a bit heavier when there’s a sigh underneath her breath.

the world is vast, words can only say so much, languages are innumerable.. but it only takes a smile to bridge all the gaps you can ever want to have filled in your life. tacit reciprocity, the whole world goes round all over again.

happy holidays to all, before i forget.

it’s a strange space, in between moments of familar strangeness when the old is peppered with the new. or perhaps, the new disguised as the old. it’s just the other side of the same coin.

the curious cat that’s gnawing for new adventures is rumblin’ and tumblin’ in my tummy. i blew a fat wad of cash at quiapo the other day for equipment. my partner-in-crime is waiting. i wonder what it would feel like driving a bike with a sidecar. wearing big watermelon helmets.

can’t wait for ’06. :)

i’m taking a deep breath of tropical smog, congesting my arteries with high-grade cholesterol. and i’m staring at the computer wanting to really write something of substance but there’s just too much to mention. hello, manila.

i found jun lopito playing a gig in makati. i gave barbie a beso the day after. this afternoon i cut my hair and i now look normal. my brother said there was a dead guy a few meters down the road who died of bangungot. i took my niece to ride the carousel at shangrila. my eyes are twitchy and feel weird, it might be the smoke. i don’t know.

where is home?

i’m sitting in front of a giant canister of popcorn. and i’m saying slap-yo-mamma giant. i must’ve consumed 10,000 calories of caramel popcorn in a span of an hour, and my logic has started to waver.

sitsirit sit. alibang bang.

“Can you believe that lots of people for reasons that are very sound to them enjoy believing that they are helpless in their own films?”

“We are game-playing, fun-having creatures, we are the otters of the universe. We cannot die, we cannot hurt ourselves any more than illusions on the [movie] screen can be hurt. But we can believe we’re hurt, in whatever agnonizing detail we want. We can believe we’re victims, killed and killing, shuddered around by good luck and bad luck.”

“You can hold a reel of film in your hands, and it’s all finished an complete – beginning, middle, end are all there that same second, the same millionths of a second. The film exists beyong the time that it records, and if you know what the movie is, you know generally what’s going to happen before you walk into the theater: there’s going to be battles and excitement, winner and losers, romance, disaster; you know that’s all going to be there. But in order to get caught up and swept away in it, in order to enjoy it to its most, you have to put in it in a projector and let it go through the lens minute by minute… any illusion requires spance and time to be experienced. So you pay your nickel and you get your ticket and you settle down and forget what’s going on outside the theater and the movie begins for you.”

illusions, robert bach

now that i’m older with a (somewhat) stable paycheck, a pandora’s box of responsibilities have come along with it – the pressing need to cut a part of the check for an IRA (which would inherently include figuring out what a good allocation would be between funds), and the proper management of free cash outside the realm of bill paying and credit card management. i’m worried that i’m losing a lot of money by having free cash stagnate in a checking account, especially when the markets aren’t in the doldrums as they were a few years ago. i’ll need to sit down sometime and study how to maneuver the cards i’ve been dealt to my advantage.

and while the clock starts ticking, you realise that the sun isn’t setting the other way (i.e. my cryptic way of saying that we’re not getting any younger). while you sit and fester in the tragedy that is los angeles traffic, the world awaits to be explored. to be seen. to be heard. to be met. to be conquered.

i want to be rich. i want to be a superstar. i want to rock and roll. but i’m too busy selling my soul to the corporate machine. werd.

the air is getting a lot chilly these days, and christmas decor dot the front lawns of socal’s denizens. the only decor i’ll ever see around this house are my chilly nipples peeking out of my shirt! that being said, i need to get my shopping done because i’m set to fly out soon to the tropical jungles of manila.

someone caught one of my 24 year old friends making out with a 17 year old high school boy. ‘he said he was 23!’ she exclaimed, as she goes on to describe how he had him cornered at a party while her friends tried to pull her away. remember to check for IDs, boys and girls! mad props to my hero, you know who you are :)

i wish i had another thanksgiving weekend. there’s a lot to be thankful for :) well, back to the grind in a couple of hours. i wonder if my hamster wheel is still in shape. there’s only so much you can do when you’re awake, and when you’re not, dreams drift off the page and melt into the sound of the alarm clock buzzing to signal the start of another sleepy monday morning.


a little button, for the little kat that i fancy :)

it only took me a split second to realise, that this is the quote of the day.

mon: “do you know the feeling when you’ve been driving up and down the same road everyday.. then you go on a vacation…. then when you come back, it still feels really good driving up and down that road again.”

“bye paul!”

i want to run, jump and hide. tumble, laugh, trip and fall. faster, cooler, upside down.

when boredom overflows, it ferments into a manic sugar rush.